Bildungsroman
by Sabbie
Summary: They were kids growing up in the middle of the war on opposite sides. What do they have in common anyway? Mild Zutara, Maiko and a crack ship.


**Bildungsroman**

K+/PG just in case.

They were kids growing up in the middle of the war on opposite sides. What do they have in common anyway?

Warning: Some Maiko, Zutara, and a crack ship nobody has really written about yet.

The stars were brightly shining and the skies were a beautiful, unbroken dark blue. It was the Ember Islands. Night insects chirruped happily and nocturnal flowers slowly started to bloom. The fire crackled as the pig-boar roasted. The skin was starting to caramelize slowly and more coconut water was poured on top of it thoroughly. There was also a pot of hot tea served on the side. Two women were sitting around the fireplace, sipping their tea calmly. One of them kept watch of the roasting animal and the other watched her with reverence. Nobody could have imagined it was possible five years ago.

"What do you think they're doing?" asked the sallow-faced woman in red.

Her companion, a girl dressed in all blue answered absentmindedly, "Hitting the streets probably, trying out street food and trying to get into trouble."

There was a crooked smile on her face.

"Where's the little earthbending girl gone to?"

"Oh, Lady Ursa took her shopping for girlier things with Suki…"

A chuckle escaped from the girl in red. "How'd they manage that?"

"They're very persuasive."

"I see."

They stopped talking. Small talk was never Mai's forte. She was blunt but not as forward as Toph. She kept quiet when she didn't need to talk because frankly, talking too much wastes energy. She started flipping one of her knives again. It had a lovely sheathing noise she loves. Whenever she got bored that SHKKKK—INNNGG noise made her sufficiently amused.

And anyway, what can you say to your replacement? He had changed so much since he joined the Avatar and his group. He was still the sweet boy she fell in love with, but somehow his priorities were different. Gone were the days that they would look at a sunset and proclaim how much they hate it, or ordering fruit pies just for the hell of it. He was suddenly more active with his people. He would actually sneak down to the slums, visit small villages, and get involved with everyone. He talked to war veterans, soldier's widows, children who were born in the colonies, see what they had to say and listened. He didn't really ignore her though, that was something she gave credit for. He always had time for her. But she stopped understanding his dreams. As horrible as it was she had a really hard time relating to the peasants and their plight. Weren't they winning the war? Why does it matter that some people were killed and went hungry? You can't fry an egg without breaking them.

They had fights, sure but he never wanted to break it off with her. He thinks she will eventually understand. He was always so positive about the world. She never understood it. For someone who's had a pretty terrible life he had an amazingly positive outlook on the world. Parts of him were jaded (and she couldn't blame him for that) but by and large he believes sincerely that everyone has the potential to be decent. (which she thought was bull)

So, she decided to have a vacation. Just to clear her thoughts and maybe decide if it was worth continuing the relationship with her fiancé. She contacted the Avatar to see if he had any suggestions of where she should be going and what places to visit. (Zuko told her that even when he was chasing the Avatar, somehow, the boy always had time to have fun along the way, which he could never comprehend.) Enthusiastically, Aang offered her a very long list. She was amused, but she told him she didn't have all the time to visit every place he recommended. Zuko ended up helping her decide which spots to hit.

She suspected secretly that perhaps he wanted to help her get it. And she did want to understand. So, they had included Kyoshi Island (where she saw Ty Lee), the Southern Air Temple (the Avatar's home base), Omashu (just to be respectful to her parents) then up to Ba Sing Se and finally Southern Water Tribe.

The trip was incredibly enlightening. She got to catch up with Ty Lee, and have a proper girls' talk with the rest of the Kyoshi Warriors. It was a quaint little place, a bit like Ember islands but less tourist-y. A few of the village's rooftops had char marks. She also noticed that the inhabitants got very quiet and tongue-tied whenever she observed them. She thought nothing of it.

Southern Air Temple was a shock. The Avatar was supposed to return later in the afternoon with the Teo and the earth bending girl. She got there earlier in the morning and explored the place on her own. The courtyard of the temple was a huge grave of nameless people. Despite having the earthbender with him, the avatar hadn't been able to fix everything. She encountered dried blood all over one of the meditation room wall, burnt marks shaped like people over the temple kitchen. And she promptly got sick.

She was trained. She was skilled in weaponry and hand to hand combat. She had participated in fights but she'd never kill anyone. And there she was, a Fire Nation citizen, standing in the midst of the atrocity her people create. What must it felt like for Zuko? What was it like for the Avatar, to come home to a desecrated place?

Despite of this she trooped away to Ba Sing Se with the Avatar and friends after a very brief stop in Omashu. The Avatar went ahead to the Earth King's palace but she decided to walk around the city leisurely. Surely there could be nothing wrong with a city so like her hometown. She would finally be able to relax and maybe stay and do nothing to help her thoughts. But once again, passing through the lower ring, seeing people in cramped, ramshackle houses, children with barely any clothes on them and women looking at her with bags under their eyes whispering cynically to each other was a bit much. She made a point to see Zuko's old house. There was a family of five living there. A mother lived there by herself, caring for her four squealing, hungry children and not having enough cash to buy food for all of them. She treated them to a hot meal involving a roasted duck-turkey.

Deep inside her thoughts, she imagined her fiancé, all skinny and sleep deprived having to work and pay his own way without much support aside from his jolly uncle. And for some reason, deep down she couldn't help but think what will the woman's family eat the day after she left?

She stopped her tour short and announced to him that she needed a break. He had been very sad and disappointed but she knew it was the right thing to do. She doesn't even know what to think anymore, let alone be a good life partner to him.

"Mai? It's ready, " Katara announced. She offered her a plate of a perfectly sliced meat.

She accepted it quietly. Katara had cooked and looked after her even when her ex fiancé was of gallivanting somewhere with the rest of the boys in the Avatar Team. No cold shoulders, no hostility. It was incredibly confusing to her. She used to be the face of the enemy yet here they were, enjoying a quiet night.

"Do you ever get used to it?" Mai asked as she sat down to a more comfortable position.

"What?"

Mai gestured with her free hand. "This."

"The skies? It's always been this starry—", Katara stopped when she saw Mai's face changing. She shrugged. "You eventually get used to it."

Katara sighed. "It's messed up isn't it? I mean I'm with your boyfriend now, Toph and Aang are going out and you're kind of trying things out with Teo. We're just recycling. "

"Well," Mai interjected, "The mustache boy should be dating the short guy by your logic."

Katara laughed. "Maybe someday."

Mai chuckled.

"Did you know? That house over there, " she pointed with the small piece of meat she was holding. "We burnt it. Zuko , Azula, me and Ty Lee."

Katara looked startled. "Why?"

Mai gave her a nonchalant shrug. "For funsies."

Katara's eyes were wide as saucers.

"Not something I'm proud of."

When Katara finally found her voice back, she could only stutter nonsensical phrases and half-formed words. The usually eloquent girl was struck speechless in the end.

Why the hell had she volunteered that information befuddled Mai. Here she was, in front of what she thinks an embodiment of a saint, her past mistakes and her incredibly shallow motivation, giving the water tribe girl a glimpse into her charmed, spoiled thing that was her life. From what Mai heard, even though Katara was somewhat of a princess in her tribe she practically lived in squalor. Zuko and The Avatar had constantly sung praises about how she put up with their little ragtag family and accepted everyone for who they are and cared for them. No wonder the two of them fell hard for the waterbender.

The silence was unbearable and it got to her. Katara was normally the chatty one and Mai felt responsible for causing the normally unflappable girl to shut her mouth.

"From what I hear you were practically hopebending since you were born."

Great. That sounded really sarcastic and glib. "I meant that in a good way," Mai sheepishly added. Still, no response. The water bender was waiting and observing her very carefully.

"Look, can we just forget what I said? I'm not exactly the nicest person around here."

Katara gave Mai a quizzical look before proceeding to reply. "Not according to Teo and Zuko,"

"Oh?" This was a new development.

"I mean Teo always went on and on about how thoughtful you are, how you always remembered the things he likes and for putting up with him when he gets all crazy inventor-y. "

"He's sweet," Mai supplied. "But I'm sure Zuko doesn't feel the same."

"He said you did give it your best shot. It meant a lot to him that you would actually travel the world and see the places he's been to."

That was unexpected. She corked her head up. "Really?"

Katara nodded. She fidgeted a little before speaking again. "You know…I never really knew why you guys broke it off…"

Mai smiled sardonically. "Classic really. We drifted apart."

"But you guys had been together since…ever!"

Mai inwardly laughed. This was so typical of the waterbender. She would feel guilty over things that weren't even in her control. Teo had called her the Team Mom. And it was probably true, she took care of all of them and she did so without much complain. And here she was, insisting on giving the palace cooks a holiday for once so she can personally roast the boar-pig and care for her boyfriend's ex girlfriend. How ironic was that?

"He became, well, Fire Lord Zuko and I'm still plain old Mai. "

Katara bit her lip. "But you're not the same girl we fought with."

"Well, no, "Mai started. "Obviously I wave no dangerous weapons at you anymore. But I'm not exactly you, or Lady Ursa."

Katara nodded, encouraging her to go on.

"The grand tour was probably the most miserable time I've had in my life. I saw everything a girl like me was meant to be sheltered from and I didn't like it one bit. What was I supposed to do? Apologize to everyone for the mistakes I never made? But at the same time I couldn't ignore what was staring me in the face. " Mai took a deep breath.

"What exactly were you supposed to think now that you know that your country had been lying to you all this time and your ex- fiancé had suffered for the longest time and you never really understood what he went through? I can't really face Zuko after." (mentally she kept asking herself about how surreal the situation was, her ex lover's current girlfriend giving her therapy and listening to her)

"You did start corresponding with Teo after Zuko suggested it."

Mai shrugged. "It was something to do. I was bored."

Katara laughed, "You always say that!"

Defensively Mai retorted, "I was!"

"You're just pretending to be this devil-may care Fire Nation royalty but you're really not, though." Katara observed. "I mean, 'Saving the jerk who dumped me?' Touring the places Zuko had to go to when he was banished, and apologizing to Teo for his crippled feet? Come on."

Mai snorted derisively.

"You burnt one building? Big deal, I cracked the Northern Water Tribe Palace and insulted Master Pakku because I was angry, risking us getting kicked out and never learning waterbending thanks to my temper!"

Mai rolled her eyes. Making ice crack in North Pole? Big freaking whoop, the whole place was made of ice. And it was full of waterbenders. Not exactly the heaviest offense if anyone asked her. She was pretty sure waterbending kids in that place probably did the same every say.

"Since you find me so amusing, I got a question to ask you," she said.

"Shoot."

"Why the hell are we having this…this! I mean we could be out there, harassing your little earthbending friend with the frilly dresses and possibly spy on the boys just to freak them out."

Katara shifted a little and she avoided Mai's eyes entirely.

"Don't tell me, he proposed and you feel guilty," she guessed.

From the way Katara was moving after she fired her suspicions, Mai knew it was a confirmed hit. Mai's shoulders slumped. And she laughed flatly. "Oh, man. You don't have to have the weight of the world in your shoulders, you know."

Carefully, Katara's eyes darted towards her. Was this why she was looking at her funny when she mentioned she burnt that guesthouse with Zuko?

"You're…okay with this?"

"Okay? You guys could've just done it already for all I care! You don't need my permission. You're both adults, for heaven's sake!"

"I feel like I'm stealing him from you!" Katara defensively yelled.

"Come on. Give yourself some credit. You didn't move in on him until after we broke up."

"Yes, well…"

"And, you're not responsible for what I did, Mom," Mai cheekily added.

Katara broke into a really large smile. "Who told you that?"

"Just about everyone."

Katara chuckled.

"Now do you feel better?" said an exasperated Mai.

"You have no idea…"

"So long as we're talking about Zuko, would you like me to dish some dirt on him?"

"That would be nice, but I know nothing about Teo to reciprocate."

They looked at each other. Mai started laughing. It was a small laugh but then Katara joined in and eventually they were both laughing together. Soon enough the small beach on the Ember Island villa where they were located was ringing with laughter.

"You're messed, you know that," one of them started.

"Not as messed as you are," the other replied.

Katara stood up. "Guess I better start packing up."

Mai rolled her eyes again. "Woman, you're the fiancée of the Fire Lord! I'm pretty sure he won't mind one wasted roast meat!"

"No, but my brother might!" Katara argued back.

Mai muttered something that was inaudible to Katara. But she roused and started helping her with packing the meat.

"You know, up till now I always thought you're this amazing holy figure –the ones that get worshipped every year in the Fire temple," Mai confessed. For some reason it was easier to talk to her now.

Katara snorted. "Me? Please. They would really have to compromise the standard of holiness if I'm to actually grace those walls."

They started hearing some barely audible noises that came closer. They paused and readied themselves before hearing the more the noises

"But Zuko!"

"No buts! I'll have no one destroy any market or any building or make anything remotely sounding like "progress" (the quote marks clanged quite heavily) to the area while we're still here!"

"It was just potatoes and two tiny metal wires!"

"Exactly my point!"

"He was barely destroying anything!"

"Practically a hiccup!"

"You're really not helping, Aang!"

Mai and Katara relaxed their body. Before Katara could start packing the meat back, a small whisper arrived in her ear. "And here comes Dad."

Both of them started laughing again.

End

Author's Note: For a fic where nothing is actually happening, this is pretty long and involved! I hope you enjoyed it..


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